Sure, after a baby the last thing you’re thinking of is sex. Babies change everything—especially how you feel about yourself. Despite the fact of how that baby was created, getting your sexy body and confidence back isn’t something that happens right away, especially if you suffered from Postpartum depression. It’s normal to have some insecurities—you’re not alone. Besides, you’re probably not going to be in the mood to have sex after the numerous things a new mom has to worry about when you’re breastfeeding: latching on and achieving let-down, engorgement, cracked nipples, mastitis, sleepless nights, and several changed diapers. You’re dealing with incredible stress and exhaustion, which definitely doesn’t help with your sex drive. You may be experiencing the physical effects of giving birth and feeling that your body isn’t your own anymore, not to mention when you actually do find the time for sex with your new-mom, hectic schedule.
So, how do I find the time for sex in order to reconnect your passionate relationship again?
1. FORGIVE YOURSELF
“To feel sexy again, you have to get out of your head and into your body.” From gaining weight during pregnancy, having anxieties about the baby, and experiencing Postpartum or even jealously about your partner’s primary focus on your baby rather than on you, remember all of these thoughts are completely normal. You’re not alone and you can forgive yourself. All of these issues will not last forever, and the more attention you give to them, the longer these feelings will continue.
2. EMBRACE YOUR NEW MOM BOD
When you have that 10 minutes after baby goes down for a nap, put on your favorite song and bust out the moves. Dancing will help you reconnect with your body and pump up those natural endorphins. If you still have a gym membership, take a Zumba class or try Yoga —reconnect spiritually. Or take a sexy selfie and send it your partner. Phone sexting can help make your partner feel desired again and let them know you still got it!
3. BUY SEXY LINGERIE
When any woman puts on beautiful lingerie, it makes her feel sexy and confident. Slipping on a sexy nursing bra by Oh La Lari or a lacy camisole, will give a much-needed boost to get into the sensual mood again. With sexy maternity lingerie and your new set of larger breasts, it is a great way to show your partner that you’re thinking of them. Lingerie shows just enough of a woman’s body to make their partner’s mind run wild!!!
4. PLAN A DATE NIGHT AT HOME
Surprisingly, your partner is probably feeling the same way as you. Planning a date night to discuss all of these new discomforts, worries, and hopes for intimacy, will help reignite the true bond that brought you two together in the first place. If you’re up for the challenge, add some candles, music, and yummy desserts. Breaking out a board game is a great distraction from constant conversations about the baby, so you two can just be in the moment and have some fun!
5. BREAK OUT THE TOYS
After birth, everything “down there” doesn’t seem to be where it used to be—especially after vaginal birth, and a C-section can also have some negative side effects because the hormones of pregnancy widen the pelvic floor. So with that said, after your six-week checkup, I highly recommend that you add lube or even a vibrator to your foreplay before intercourse. It will help with the soreness and discomfort that comes with sex after childbirth.
Just like you will sleep throughout the night again, and you will go out with friends again, and you may even be open to giving birth again, you WILL want to have sex again. Give yourself time to heal your body and to adjust to your new-mom roles. Communicate with your partner and eventually you will get back to your previous routine of intimacy. You might not have as much sex as you had before kids, but you will find that passionate connection again soon. Good Luck!
Written by,
Corinne Braunwarth
Edited by Haley Doeppers
Oh La Lari® Top Sexy Sellers